I think the hardest thing I have found about writing this blog has been still writing a post when I am not feeling at ease in my life. I write to enthuse others, I want to help, to lift you all up and make you feel like you are ready to face the world. This is easy when things are going great in my life….I want to share the joy!
Not so easy if I feel like hiding from the world protected by a layer of duvet (or doona) with a hot water bottle, good book and an endless supply of chocolates!
I don’t know about anyone else but I find that I have to remind myself now and again that I am not this….
Although I would very much like to think my thighs looked like hers, it is time to come clean….I am not super woman.
My dog is the only one I know who has managed to maintain some sort of stable state of positivity, and even then she struggles when she sees that she is not coming with me when I go to the supermarket (tail down, slow walk to the bed pose and instant owner guilt trip).
I really do think it is important that we remind ourselves that we are human and have a full spectrum of emotions. Don’t try to be happy if your not! It is okay to feel….go ahead, I am giving you permission. You see when let yourself feel, you are in the position to let go of whatever it is that is causing the emotions in the first place.
Now don’t get me wrong, there is a difference between feeling low and wallowing…I mean if the whole box of chocolates have gone and now your finishing off the tub of ice cream, wallow alert! I speak from experience. I’m sure we have all been there at some point.
After you have satisfied your duvet hibernation, it is time to switch the feeling. Recognise when everything is getting too much. The thoughts are repeating themselves (my brain is the master at this!) and you start to spiral. This is when you need to say STOP.
A good friend reminded me the other week of the importance of an action plan. These were the questions I asked myself:
- What is it that I am feeling?
Accept the feeling! Acknowledge it. Once you have acknowledged something is there you are in a position to be able to deal with it.
- Why do I think I am feeling this?
It is important to be really honest with yourself here. Not just put yourself down and say that you are not good enough….WHY do you feel that you are not good enough? If you are not honest with yourself then you can not be honest with others. It is okay to not be sure what is causing the feeling. That is also being honest, although deep down you will know.
- What can I do to change this feeling?
Not in a “put a smile on your face and get on with it” way but a genuine what needs to change?
- Can I do anything about this?
There is a difference between want and can’t…most people don’t want to change something about their present circumstances due to fear.
- What are the steps? What needs to happen first?
I firmly believe that the way to successful change is through one step at a time. Slow and steady wins the race. By all means grab at those opportunities but remember the steps YOU took to put yourself in the right place to be presented with those opportunities.
What do you do when you feel low?